So I'll just be brutally honest. Might as well, right? I seek an intelligent, shorter, chubbier woman anywhere in the US. Because my job is remote and because I'm tired of where I live, I'm open to relocation.

I'm an introverted, laid-back homebody. I have a cat. I smoke weed from time to time. I love reading and binging shows and travelling. And I LOVE to eat. Show me a woman who will cook for me, and I'll show you a man who worships that woman. I believe in old-fashioned monogamy and I prefer the husband/wife lifestyle, even if legal marriage itself is off the table. I'm divorced (looking back, I think my first marriage was my training ground for the next chapter of my life. I believe in some form of Creator but I am not religious. I tend to lean left in my values (I'm pro-choice, anti-Trump, I think climate change is real thing). I have a bit of the hippie in me, and I LOVE the Grateful Dead. I have two tattoos, both Grateful Dead images. I've published eight books in my life, but these days I'm more ashamed of them than anything. I have a ton of love and affection to give. I will spoon you every chance I get. I don't have any children but I'm not opposed to them.

As to the woman I seek, as I said, I prefer short women on the heavier side. I want an intelligent woman I can have deep conversations with about anything. I want someone who is kind and loving and compassionate and caring.

I come with some flaws, but there is a good man in this body and he has a TON of love to give to the woman who will stand by him to the end. And be it known: the next time I fall in love must be the last time. I want someone I can be buried next to.