Hi everyone. M25 here. So to start, I know I let myself go trust me. I’m often reminded by my dad on how I quote “used to be so skinny lol”. I feel it every waking moment of every day so trust me I know. I’m just looking for something here. Tbh I don’t know what but I’m just depressed about this whole thing and I can’t take it anymore.

The skinny pictures are in like 2018/2019. I was in the best shape of my life hovering at about 190-200lbs. I felt great and got out and played a LOT of basketball and went for mile or so runs practically every day.

Over the past few years I’ve really just dropped off the face of the planet if the planet was a healthy lifestyle. It’s been just whatever’s there and most of the time too much of it. The only thing that has really changed is I’ve gotten married since then. The past few years have been rough as fuck.

Admittedly when I was around 190lbs I was really bummed to find out I had Gyno. I’ve never been medically told I have it but it’s obvious as I can feel the golf ball sized lumps behind my nipples.

I just feel like even if I did work hard and lose weight (I’m currently like 260ish) it wouldn’t matter because I would still have bitch tits. It’s literally the pain of my existence. I can’t do anything without being conscious of it. It IS me.

I’ve even gone as far recently as to wearing a binder to try it out and honestly it was just worse being hot and sweaty.

I really don’t have the funds to have full on surgery and I’m lost, scared, depressed and I’m just mentally broken having dealt with this since I was like 13. I don’t want to KMS or anything but I definitely just want to not exist sometimes.

What are my options here? Are their any realistic alternatives for me?