Today I met with the hospice nurse. Tried to explain to my grandmother why a DNR is the right decis...

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Today I met with the hospice nurse. Tried to explain to my grandmother why a DNR is the right decision for her.

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She has a mortal fear of hospitals, and has already signed an in-hospital DNR. She has senile dementia and doesn't really understand what's going on. Tried to explain that an out-of-hospital DNR simply means broken ribs, transportation to the hospital, where her DNR will kick in.

She either dies anyway, or lives in the hospital in awful pain from broken ribs.

I still feel like an awful person for encouraging her to sign the DNR. She's smaller, greyer, and more absent every day. She has maybe a month to live.

Driving these decisions, and particularly pushing for the DNR, makes me want to die.

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Posted: 12 years ago
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