Well. This was a complete disaster.

I had my reservations about doing it as our "date" grew closer, but everytime I checked in with my boyfriend he still wanted it to happen. I wanted to make him happy, and the idea of having sex with this other guy was appealing after all, so when the time came, I went.

I was nervous. I won't deny that. I worried that after it was over, and the initial excitement wore off, both Andy and I would regret it. But it was his kink to show me off and share me, and I was willing to try for him so I marched up to his apartment and rang the bell. He buzzed me in and up I went to have sex with a man I barely knew.

He opened the door and he was just as gorgeous as last time. He greeted me with that warm smile and a tight hug. My heart was already pounding, and I was already aroused. He smelled so good, and being squeezed against his firm body made me melt. He pulled me inside and without a word he leaned down to kiss me and I kissed him back.

His hands explored my body, and pulled my clothes off as we passionately made out. We worked our way to the bedroom, leaving a trail of our clothes behind us, and he laid my naked body on the bed. My head was spinning, my body burned with need, and all feeling of anxiousness were replaced with lust. He kissed me everywhere, licking at my breasts, nibbling my nipples. My moans filled the room and I squirmed as his fingers pleasured me.

He slowly made his way down my body, and buried his face between my legs. His tongue and fingers bringing me to the brink of ecstacy. His mouth on my clit and fingers inside me brought me over the edge, and I slammed my legs closed around his head as an orgasm crashed over my body. Waves of pleasure overtook me and I couldn't control the shaking as he brought me to bliss.

We both took a few moments to recover, and he climbed onto the bed next to me. He was very hard, and I immediately reached for his impressive cock. I wrapped my hands around it, and slowly stroked him, using the copious amounts of precum as lube, while we kissed. I wanted him inside me right then and there, but then my phone buzzed. It took me out of it immediately, and my anxiety returned.

I apologized to my new friend and leaned over to check, already knowing what the message was. My heart sank as I read the text from Andy.

He changed his mind.

I put the phone back down, and laid back on the bed, my heart in my throat. I thought I was going to cry. This man had just given me an amazing orgasm, we were laying in bed with eachother, completely naked. His dick was pressed against me, and he was gently grinding on my leg. His hand was on my breasts and he was kissing my neck. What was I going to do?

It all felt so good, but I had to stop this. The guilt was eating away at me, and I laid there motionless, gently moaning at his touches, as he climbed ontop of me. He was about to do it, and I panicked. I told him to wait, and I squirmed out from under him. I sat on the edge of the bed, trying to calm my heart and breathing. This poor man.

To his credit he waited patiently for me to calm down, and all I could do was say I'm sorry over and over. I didn't know what else to say. I felt terrible. I lead this man to believe he was going to have me. He gave me an incredible orgasm, but now I was denying him. I just kept saying sorry.

He got up and walked around in front of me, and said it was okay, though I can't imagine what he knew what was actually wrong. He knelt down so we were eye level, and said it was okay again. But it wasn't okay. I felt terrible.

He stood up again, and was about to turn and walk away, going where I don't know, but I grabbed his hand. He stopped and turned back to face me. I pulled him closer, and his dick was right at eye level. He wasn't fully hard anymore, but that didn't matter. I was going to make him cum at the very least. I felt guilty for teasing him. I felt guilty for not letting him have sex with me. I had to do it

I wrapped my lips around his dick and started sucking. He didn't complain and let me work him with my mouth. I felt him growing harder, and I continued blowing him. I took him to the back of my throat, and like last time he gave me a little help by pushing on my head. I took him down my throat, and held him there, looking up at him to see his reaction. I had to see if I was making him feel good. Based on that smile, I was.

I continued sucking him, stroking him, deepthroating him, and I ignored the second message I got from my boyfriend. I wasn't stopping until I made this poor man cum. I was aggressive, and hungry for it. I was sloppy, letting myself drool. I was moaning as I tasted his precum. God I wanted him inside me. I was aching for him. I wanted to feel him stretch me and fuck me. My free hand found itself between my legs and I was so wet.

I resisted the temptation to masturbate as I sucked him. I resisted the urge to beg him to fuck me. I focused everything on him. It was difficult. He was so hot, his dick was big and impressive. I wanted to look up at him as he was ontop of me, thrusting into me. But I did resist. And instead I swallowed his dick and held it there as he started to cum.

I made sure I swallowed it all, and continued bobbing my head on him until I couldn't taste anymore cum. I popped off his dick gave it a soft kiss and told him I had to go. He was disappointed, but understood, or maybe he didn't understand, but he wasn't going to argue. I gathered my clothes and checked that message I missed. It was Andy again asking if I wasn't answering because I was having sex. He was partially right.

I texted back that I got his message and was going home. He asked if we had sex. I said no. Then he said he was sorry, but he didn't have anything to be sorry for and I told him as much.

He wanted to come over and talk about it, but I wasn't in the mood. Instead I masturbated, fucking myself with a dildo, because I needed something inside me.

We did talk later that night and he asked me what happened. I told him everything up to receiving his text. How we were naked, and he just finished making me cum, and we were about to have sex. Then Andy was quiet on the phone. He hesitated to ask me, or rather accuse me of having sex with him. I wasn't mad or upset about him changing his mind, but not believing me was something else. I was furious.

I told him that I sucked his dick because I felt bad. He called me a liar and said we fucked. I hung up on him. He called me back a dozen times and texted me a dozen more. He fluctuated from apologizing, to calling me a liar and a whore, to apologizing, several times. I ignored him.

We still haven't talked. I'm not sure I want to. I'm so mad. What a mess. What a mistake.