Repost because Valentine's Day and the Pastebin link was dead anyway. I hope this makes a sad weeb laugh!

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My name is Itis I’Dio. I'm 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am married to my Stand. Her name is Bullet. I am mute and only speak using her voice. Non-Stand users can hear her thanks to one of her abilities.

I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke or drink, but I have a sweet tooth. I love my wife’s cooking and always delight in it after work. We are in bed by 10 PM, and I make sure I get eight hours of sleep no matter what, which only leaves us two hours every night to have sex. She always wrings me dry and I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress. I usually go through my morning routine alone, while Bullet prepares the food for when we return from work and my usual breakfast of Cheddar toasties.

I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies or things like winning and losing. I just want to fuck my wife and eat her food. That is how I live my life, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight, I wouldn't lose to anyone.

I am sometimes involved in defending humanity from the villains that crop up in the city of Morioh. Humanity is of great importance to me because producing the ingredients for my wife’s cooking ourselves would be a hassle.

Here’s an account of my average day.

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If you like my writing and want more, check out my kinda maybe probably not complete Script Master List or my VERY incomplete AO3