The totally awesome original audio by the super-adorable CheshirePurr

And then... an overly ridiculous whispered response by meeee...!

(this response audio was made last night when I was supposed to go to sleep early so I could wake up in time for work. I was almost late because I was up late doing silly things like this... BUT IT WAS TOTALLY WORTH IT :D)

TINKLY TIP OF THE DAY

Licking, kissing, and sucking the back of your hand is a good way to generate "oral luvin'" noises. However, this is mostly for cunnilingus. If you're trying to, ahem, "kiss the dragon", you could probably... I dunno, use a banana or something.

WORK THAT BANANA.

And now, a wildly unnecessary story, hastily written at work. Because Chess (/u/CheshirePurr) refuses to believe me when I say that she's adorable. >3

It was another glorious morning in the House of Tinkles. The sun was shining, the birds were chirping, and I was drinking bubble tea and trying to stuff all 64 GB of my phone's microSD card with pictures and videos of Nara Kwon from Hello Venus.

A soft knock at the front door interrupted my peaceful routine. As I'd had some odd visitors barge through my front door in the past I was understandably a little cautious when I opened it, only to find... /u/CheshirePurr?

Chess fidgeted nervously, and when she saw me, her mouth opened as though to say something, before closing with a hint of uncertainty. Her eyes glanced to the side, refusing to meet mine, and one foot softly scuffed the dirt on the ground in nervousness. After a few moments of worried timidity, her eyes shyly met mine, and in that one moment before her courage failed her again, she spoke.

"Can I..." Her eyes dipped down and to the side. "Can I borrow your Gurren Lagann Blu-Rays?"

Ah, she's so adorable, I thought.

Unfortunately, I realized a second too late that I spoke out loud.

Once again, her wide eyes met mine, her eyelashes blinking rapidly in shock, looking for a moment like a deer caught in the headlights. Soft, delicate lips parted in a subtle "oh" of surprise, before her eyes flickered down to the ground. Her cheeks colored lightly with a faint blush as her little heart beat faster.

Her hands, which she had been wringing nervously, she now clutched to her chest in tiny fists, two slender index fingers reaching out to poke against each other in an expression of innocent worry.

"I'm..." Her voice was as soft and unsure as a lost kitten's meow. "I'm not adorable. I'm not adorable at all."

"If you say so," I deadpanned. Nope, no adorableness going on here at all.

I turned, wondering if I might be blinded by sheer cuteness, and rushed to grab what she wanted. It took only seconds to return and hand it to her.

She clutched the little boxes to her face, as though trying to hide her still-red cheeks. Wide, innocent eyes stared looked back at me over the tops of the boxes, thin, delicate strands of hair waving softly in the morning breeze.

"Th- thank you," she whispered, before turning as quickly as she could and trying to walk away without looking like she was fleeing.

That was pretty adorable, I thought ("I'm not adorable!" I thought I heard on the wind). Perhaps I should have left it at that. Certainly a more wise and prudent person would have been fine with just that... but, honestly, if there's one thing in the world I like more than bubble tea and Nara Kwon, it's trolling cute girls.

And nothing shouts ^{or rather, whispers} "troll in the dungeons!" quite like a totally ridiculous whispered audio response.