He had mentioned this before, but I guess I didn’t realize the extent. I would have easily opted for just being friends, but I didn’t get that option.

I sent one last text, desperate I’m sure and he replied with this:

“Listen (my name) I had a good time with you and you’re really nice but I’m just not ready to be talking to anyone, I need to focus on myself and my well being and I think you should too! Im sorry we didn’t get to do everything we wanted, I think that’s just part of life sometimes. I’m not ready for all of this^{^} nor do I want it right now either honestly. I’m sorry I’m hurting you by choosing myself, it’s not what I wanted but in the words of RuPaul, “if you don’t love yourself, how the hell are you gonna love anyone else, can I get an Amen?””

I get it, but it still sucks. But now I don’t feel like crying over it anymore. I just feel a bit empty.