I just want to escape my head, all the time. I hate the way I make myself feel when I get lost in thought, and it's never a good kind of lost ya know? It's always the same thoughts: nobody cares, nobody is here, i will always be alone, I deserve to be alone, you make people feel uncomfortable and everyone hates you for it, just shut up and stop embarrassing yourself!

Every day I see people smiling and laughing, enjoying life with friends and loved ones. I think that's the most painful part of it all, knowing that nobody is thinking about you, nobody cares if you're happy or not.

I've given so much love to this world and still have plenty to give, but I can feel my loneliness and my depression killing off the things that make me, me. I just want somebody to notice me, to love me for me, to believe in me and trust in me, or at the very least tell me theyre thinking about me whether they mean it or not... i just want an honest human connection, it's not too much to ask, right?