My Dom saw my post of yesterday (Life of a canvas) and tried to post her response but it was removed. I try to post it in her behave hopping to have a better luck. It really melted my heart. I love you Domina, and love you guys for the nice and supportive comments of yesterday.

"Dear Baby Girl,

I read somewhere that the underside of happiness was not sadness but numbness. Life was exactly that for me. It was empty and blank and colourless. The black abyss was eating me alive and I didn't even know it. 

I went about my days with my masks. I have lost count of the masks that I wore. I was everyone's pillar of strengths and the one to go to when they were in trouble. I was strong and capable and always have an answer to everything. Thus, I kept on telling myself that this was me. There is an old saying: "If you told a lie a hundred times, you started to believe it as the truth.

Then the world fell apart, the pandemic, the isolation and the dissolution of my identity kicked into full gear. My connection to my world was severed like everyone else existed in 2020. As the isolation rolled from days to weeks to months, my numbness pulled me deeper and deeper into the abyss. My survivor instincts kicked into full gear and my mind was spinning out of control. I attempted at everything and tried to fix me but didn't even know where to begin. Fear and desperation made me irrational and impulsive. My soul was dying and my face was smiling. 

When life closed a door, it always opened a window. In midst of my nightmare, you appeared, so innocent, pure and untainted, like fresh lilies after rain. You were shy, soft and sensitive. Your beautiful soul glowed gently under its own masks. Like me, you have struggled with your own challenges. You searched for a domme to lift you out of paleness of our world and be transformed anew. You wanted to be bright, vibrant and coloured. I wanted to make you happy in every possible ways. You gave me a reason to be soft, to feel and to love. You lifted me out of my numbness and hurt through your gentleness, patience and submission. I wanted to give you every possible pleasures that the world of dared to offer. 

A dominant desired to be needed and a submissive desired to be wanted. The statement rang true. You needed me and I wanted you. Through bdsm, we removed our masks and displayed our truths without interference. We finished each other's sentences, occupied each other's mind and encapsulated each other's soul. Our time has only began and we have many challenges ahead. However, nothing worthy is ever easy.

Thank you for stepped into my life and eevated my soul out of darkness with your light. I can't wait to show you the world. Let the world see you the way that I see you, a true masterpiece that you are.

Love, Domina."