Has anybody read or watched Normal People?

I recently discovered the book/TV show without having any knowledge underlying themes of sexual power dynamics would come up. I found it to be quite frustrating at times because the characters issues often arise out of basic lack of communication skills. However, I also found it very thought provoking (although I don’t particularly agree with all the messages in the story)

There’s tons to talk about but part that really grabbed my attention was when Marianne finally explicitly told Connell that she was submissive. She only admitted this to Connell after she explored these desires with another man.

You never said any of this to me, he says. When we were ... It was different with you. We were, you know. Things were different. She twists the little strip of wood with both hands and then releases it on one side so it recoils from her fingers. Should I be feeling insulted? he says. No. If you want to hear the simplest explanation, I’ll tell you. Well, is it a lie? No, she says. She pauses. Carefully she sets down the wooden coffee-stirrer. She has no props now, and reaches to touch her hair instead. I didn’t need to play any games with you, she says. It was real. With Jamie it’s like I’m acting a part, I just pretend to feel that way, like I’m in his power. But with you that really was the dynamic, I actually had those feelings, I would have done anything you wanted me to.

This reminded me of my past relationships. The less fruitful ones were often the ones where my partners and explored power dynamics through all the usual kinks. However, the most meaningfu/transformative relationship of mine didnt involve all of the stereotypical physical aspects, but yet… there was still this understanding that she could do absolutely anything she wanted to do to me.

(Note: I also acknowledge the gender/power roles are reversed in this particular context, but I figured I’d share as I see no difference, and can still relate to this)