Hi, I worry that cause of my upbringing, my parents grew up in an old fashion Latin family and that passively I picked up a lot of things that make me come off as tough, stoic, or overly serious when in public places, kind of like a RBF until I open up. I want the softness and also dom from my partner and I feel I want it from a place of enjoyment and comfort. The problem is when I try to approach someone that induces these feelings I end up getting flustered and I go quiet or unsure of what to say and I feel like they think I’m not interested. The worse is when a potential partner mistakes my natural state as meaning I want to be the dominant one and then they get mad when I open up and they realize I want to be soft. I know it’s a reaction and I can’t let it rule my actions, but it makes me not want to open up.

Any advice on how to be more approachable or maybe come off more as wanting this?