I was traveling in a foreign country I'd been to many times. Got a message on one of the apps from a local 18yo interested in meeting me. I'm in my 50s. I'm not a big fan of just hooking up. I like to meet a guy in public, make sure he's legit, get to know each other, flirt, make him laugh a little, see if there's chemistry. I like to develop a little crush before taking things further. But it was late in the afternoon, all the places I could think to meet had already closed for lunch or weren't open yet for dinner. And it was raining and he didn't have an umbrella.

So I told him the hotel where I was staying, and to wait for me in the lobby at a very specific time. I had an extra umbrella and walking around in the rain can be fun. About 10 minutes before that very specific time, I get a call from reception asking if I was expecting a young man. My heart sank. I hadn't even told this boy my full name or room number, wtf did he say to reception?

"Uhh… yes," I said. "Okay, we'll send him up!" Turns out he casually showed them pictures from my dating profile because he didn't have enough data to message me directly. I was kind of angry with him about that, it's a fancy hotel and I stay there for weeks and months at a time, the staff know me and I try to be discreet, I never have random boys showing up with nothing but a picture of me hell no.

I didn't have time to be angry about it, there was a knock at the door. It was him. He walked in, threw off his wet jacket and baseball cap, said "Oh wow you're even cuter in person!!" and basically lept in to my arms. I'm 6 feet (1.83m) tall; he's smaller at 5'6" (1.68m) height, skinny, smooth, total twink, and he looked better than his pictures, too. He instantly started kissing me, not shy at all. He had so much energy, but his whole body was so stiff. I said "Relax your lips." He did, and I slowly licked his teeth. He let out a little whimper and I could feel his whole body melt and relax.

We kissed for about 3 hours. We did a little oral, but mostly we kissed and talked and kissed some more. He told me he was already in love with me, and that he was going to marry me. He had a little glimmer in his eye, he looked so happy he could cry. I told him he's crazy, he just met me. "I don't care," he said. "With love, anything is possible" then laughed in a really corny way on purpose, "hwah hwah hwaaaahhhh" which made us both laugh really hard. I kinda fell for him in that moment.

I asked if he was hungry, he eagerly said yes he was ready to have dinner and spend the rest of his life with me, hwah hwah hwah. He kept making me laugh with that. It had stopped raining, everything was open so we decided to walk around until we saw a place we liked.

On the street, without asking me, he held my arm, not like a boy holding his dad's hand, but like a bride walking down the aisle. Total "this is MY man" vibes. I didn't want to rebuff him, but to be honest it made me uncomfortable.

Because of the age gap.

I wish he were a little more discreet. At restaurants he sits next to me instead of across from me so he can hold my hand or secretly play with my bulge. Less secretly, he'll stare at me and caress my grey beard, and sometimes kiss me on my forehead or cheek and tell me how lucky and proud he feels to be seen with me.

The thing is, when we're in restaurants, hotel lobbies or taxis in his country, nobody bats an eyelid when he rests his head on my shoulder or lovingly kisses me on the lips. It feels… normal.

On the street, it's another story, and it's not just my imagination. One elderly lady did a double-take, stopped in her tracks, jaw dropped and she stared directly at me in disgust(?) as we walked by. I've seen persons in groups of 3 or 4 get the attention of their friends as they point at us and snicker to each other. "So what?" he says, when I tell him.

One very obviously gay guy came up to him and said, "Tell your uncle I want some of that. Yum!" thinking I didn't speak the language. Walking around like that definitely gets people's attention.

In some ways I think it's great that younger generations care less about how others perceive their relationships, whether gay or with an age gap. On the other hand, being someone who has "street smarts", I feel like I have to be doubly alert to what's happening in front of, around and behind us. I've asked, "aren't you worried about someone attacking us?" to which he responded, "You'll protect me." I said, "What if they have weapons or if there are like 8 of them?" He was like, "Oh. I didn't think of that." He's been a bit more discreet since I mentioned that, but not totally.

Have any of you experienced this kind of thing, whether older or younger, and how did you handle it if one of you generally tries to "fly under the radar" ?