...I am actually not entirely sure if this is considered NSFW 💀💀💀 So just to be safe 🤷🏾

I (22) have an older (50) fwb. I think???? he has erectile disfunction. He has trouble staying hard for too long. When he fucks me he randomly gets soft and will remain so. I do not know if it is me (as in maybe I do not turn him on) or him (possibly he has erectile disfunciton)? I do know, it makes play kind of boring and repetitive. Our hookups are pretty much the same. We get in the bed. We kiss. I ride him. Oral sometimes.

Other than doggy and riding, not many positions work for us. It also does not help that I refuse to let him fuck me doggy. With him it really hurts. He can't stay hard long enough to get me ready/ tease me, so he just rams it in before he gets soft. It is pretty painful for me. Lube works a little, but I would still have to be turned on and without teasing I am not.

Advice: How should I bring up the fact that he may have it? Does he know he might? Should he see a doctor? Is there anything that helps?

For background: We met in January. I was going through something so we decided no sex, just hang outs. He was just there for me. I still enjoy that- we still hang with no intent on fucking. He is also really sweet. He is a genuine friend and I am scared I would lose our friendship if I bring it up. 🥺🥺 I really do not want him to feel any type of way

Anywhooo. Back to the important bits. In March I decided I wanted birthday sex and he was all for it. It was our first time trying. He could not get hard. He insisted it never happened before and that he had lots to drink the night before and it may have been the cause. I had never had a partner not been able to get hard/ nor had ones that had trouble staying hard and I just figured it was probably nothing. "Maybe next time," I hoped.

Then, there was next time. And a few more timea. Same issue. He did not drink the night before. He did not work. He was not out late with friends. All the reasons he had given each time for why he could not get it up. But still he struggled.

I know he has had open heart surgery. He is a bit big. And his diet and exercise is pretty shit (both of us to be honest with this one). These could all be factors to ed, right?

Perhaps I should leave it alone?