So for context I've been with my bf for almost 9 years, the company was originally his and he asked if I would help whilst I studied, together we built up what was a successful company.

The recent cost of living crisis has meant we've lost a lot of buisness and as such we've been forced to wind down operations. He's previously cheated the in past but I've been keen to work through it and I thought we reached a point where we were okay. Since then I've helped him get a new job and worked long hours without an income to make sure the company still ran smoothly before his job transition.

It was whilst doing some website and email stuff on his PC a flirty message came up, I clicked on it and discovered he had been seeing someone else sexually. He always tells me he's too tired for any intimate time together and never intiates, I've repeatedly asked him if he doesn't find me attractive anymore and he denies it. I've even suggested an open relationship in the past but he just has secret meet ups without protection and this has sometimes led to me getting a infection as a biproduct.

He lies about what he does then blames me. And whenever I try and talk about these things he just gets angry and asks me to leave.

How do I break up with someone who won't even talk to me or be honest about these things?