When I was growing up, my father was a raging alcoholic. He would pass out at various times of the day, under the guise of "taking a nap".

When I was around 11 and 12 , I began lying down with him so that I could "nap" with him. I'd lie there and as soon as I was sure that he was fully out (I could tell by his breathing) I would place my hand on his stomach which was lightly hairy. Now my dad always wore short shorts in the summer and no underwear. It was easy for me to move my hand down the treasure trail and unbutton his shorts.

What I found inside was breathtaking. He had a nice thick cock, uncut, with a lot of foreskin. I started gingerly, just by holding his cock and other times as I grew bolder I would play with it a little bit more. He would get hard and I would pull his foreskin back. The last time I remember doing it, I actually took his cock into my mouth. It felt so good and so warm.

I did it the last time when I was 12 and to be honest, I think about it all the time.

Many years later after my dad had stopped drinking, he and I had a conversation, in which he divulged to me that as a youth he had been molested by a man. I quickly changed the subject.

One of my biggest regrets in life is that I did not delve further into that conversation. I fantasise asking him what the man did to him. At that point, my dad was a widow and I know that he was not getting any action. I think all the time about how I could probably have talked him into letting me play with his cock and especially docking that amazing foreskin.

My dad is long gone, but I'm always looking for an older and white man that I could live out that fantasy with.