I had a boyfriend for 4 years. We are broken up now for 2 years. He was a good guy sometimes. Did a lot of things behind my back, put me down a lot and was never fully honest.

Well the sex was good but I wanted more. We made love more than having sweaty kinky sex. I would occasionally suck cocks or get fucked by guys with bigger cocks just to scratch the itch. It never bothered me because it was one and done and I had no feeling for those guys, usually never talking to them again.

Fast forward to when we broke up. I found out he was seeing someone on the side for almost a year. A full blown relationship. Not just fucking someone which didn’t bother me. It was the emotional cheating he did to me that fucked with me. I forgave him for it but we never got back together. Hooking up once in a while but he clearly moved on much quicker than I have and has dated a few guys while I haven’t and he kept me on a string for when he was lonely.

He asked if I ever cheated on him and I said “I thought about it” but never admitted because he hurt me so much from what he did and pretty much pushed me to the side and used me when he was lonely.

I just completely cut him off after 2 years of back and forth bullshit and now I’m feeling guilty sometimes for fucking guys behind his back and never telling him about it while all the bad things he did were found out. Should I tell him or leave it be? He put me through a-lot of emotional bullshit for the past 6 years and feel he doesn’t deserve to know as a karma for what he did.