Lately, I've had many experiences with bottoms telling me not to cum. Basically, I'm in the middle of the act, which had been going on for let's say an hour. This is just the penetrative sex portion, not foreplay, kissing etc (that would have been the first hour or so). While we're in the midst of having sex, I get the urge to explode (it feels amazing and it's usually a week or so between my orgasms). Out of courtesy, I let him know that I'm getting close. Then, suddenly, he says, "Not yet".

I'm unsure how most tops feel but when I hear that, I get completely out of the sensation and usually lose my erection. Denial during the act, for me, puts me in a really messed up headspace. I want to show my appreciation for an amazing session by releasing but, constantly, I get told to wait. In my mind, which is my sexual hotspot, I just turn off and tune out.

Another situation: I'm in the midst of giving great rim jobs and get a massive erection. I know it's time to "get it on" but, then, I get told, "Not yet". It's a total boner killer, especially after us both getting hot and bothered for at least 30 minutes to an hour. My jaw gets tight and sore and I just wanna get it in but there's that denial again.

It's frustrating and just not very hospitable. I know, it feels good, whatever is going on. Just to tell someone "NO" when it's just amazing makes me feel like my pleasure isn't worth their time. As a note: I can last for hours on end in the bed. I'm literally working my ass off for these guys. This isn't just one person or one incident, it's repeatedly occurring and it makes me want to be celibate. Am I just overthinking things? Should I just have sex for the bottom to be pleased while leaving myself high and dry? What am I missing here?

Any advice would be surely appreciated.