Ok. My husband and I have been together for 20years. When we met, we each had friends of our own. Neither of us had any trouble introducing each other to our friend groups.

Now, about 2 years ago we moved to another city in a different state. Neither of us have friends here, so we're trying to build a social circle. My default assumption is that if I make a friend or make plans with people, my husband is included. If any of my new friends didn't want my husband to come, then I know they aren't people for me.

My husband is not on that page. He'll make plans and then worry about "asking if I can come". And he doesn't see why that is upsetting to me. Like, he'll say "so and so and I are going to grab coffee down the street" and if I were to want to go, I'd be subjected to hims and haws and I don't know.

He says I'm making him responsible for my social life. But I've made some friends here and they are now his friend too.

To get it out of the way: he's not cheating, we're open. So Idgaf if he's taking 12 anon dicks on Christopher St... This is about our social life, not our sex life.