It feels like it's impossible to escape from. I've been off the "personal" (AKA with people you usually know IRL) socials for years, but in places that are completely unrelated to anything associated with diet/fitness culture and are innocuous
like Discord servers, subreddits, or podcasts about hobbies or interests, I feel like I always run across some post that's someone congratulating someone else on losing weight or eating "healthy" or someone saying "I LOST X NUMBER OF WEIGHT AND IMPROVED MYSELF" and feel triggered by numbers and then I feel guilty by feeling like I'm taking away from something they're proud of and I'm the problem, not them. Being surrounded by all this stuff often makes me question myself, like I lack self-control or dicipline after doing all-in and gaining weight or no longer doing "traditional" forms of exercise and only doing an activity I enjoy when I have the energy to do it and within the limits given by my ED specialist. Seeing all of this "self-improvement" makes me worry a partner is going to see what I used to look like and think I'm lazy and want the "hotter" version of me from before and that's a deep fear I have these days. My question is: for those who have been in recovery longer than myself, does this stuff ever get easier where it kinda just bounces off you and doesn't send you into some existential crisis? Is it just time and getting used to it? How do you deal with these things happening in your social circles? Why is our society like this and obsessed with this?