There are posts all over the internet asking for help with dating and finding a partner, and it feels like the tip I always see most often is along the lines of "WORK ON YOUR BODY" and/or "GO TO THE GYM" and I feel like they just confirm my fears I'm unlovable now and people will think I'm gross, lazy, or don't put "effort" into my appearence. These posts always seem to imply exercise/fitness is equal to value and that's "bettering" yourself as a person. I think since undergoing recovery, I'm always scared people will want the old me back, yet when I was exercising like crazy and had this "ideal" body I was feeling ill constantly and had to sleep all the time because exercise was consuming all my energy. I think a lot of my ED came from a place of because I deal with a lot of mental health issues and being autistic (although I didn't learn this until last year), had trouble with school/work, and now qualify for disability, I felt like if I made up for it with my appearance someone would overlook my other flaws and now I feel like I offer nothing to a partner. And then you also see those posts that are like "My partner has gained weight, what do I do?" and all the replies are "DUMP THEM" and I feel like it just confirms my fears that weight gain=bad and if that ever happens to me I'll be left alone. Can anyone else relate to this?