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NSFW Sex Questions/Do You Feel This Way?
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Hey guys,

Lately I have been struggling a lot with people intimate with my gf of 3 years. Well, actually, this is something I've always struggled with but has been on my mind more.

I can't get past the reality of never being able to cum like a cisgender man does. It is something I want so badly to the point where it completely ruins sex for me because I know I'll never have that. I know there are toys out there that let you "cum", but my gf isn't really interested in strap-ons at all (another issue I've had).

In general, it really upsets me that I am unable to have sex like a cisgender man can (PIV). When I have used strap-ons (with previous partners) the process of getting them on ruined things for me and made me feel really sad because it was very blatantly saying "you don't have this and you can't do this without the aid of something".

I don't know how to get over all this and just let myself enjoy the things I can do. Has anyone else experienced this?

edit: I am not looking for suggestions for products (strap-ons, pack n plays). That is not going to solve the issue.

Comments
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I’m not able to pack due to some weird allergies (in short and simple: I can be allergic to my own sweat). So, a pack and play would be nice if I packed (and my gf was wanting to use strap-ons). I’ve also not come across a very good pack and play when I’ve looked in the past.

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Been about 7 years of being sexually active and still haven’t figured anything out. But if you want someone to talk to who understands — I’m your guy!

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Been on T for 7 years now. Not sure that my growth is enough/other parts are out of the way enough to allow for it. But perhaps.

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Never heard of Gender Mender before. Thanks for the recommendation.

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T-2011, Top surgery-2013, Hysto-2017

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6 years ago