As a cis gay/queer male in my late 30s, I unfortunately grew up with little education on trans issues. Definitely learned a ton over the last decade and feel like a strong ally.

However, I still feel like a complete novice when it comes to more intimate interactions. I’m in an open relationship with a cis male and have been “liked” or “swiped” on apps by trans men and have done the same if I’m attracted. I met some great trans people, have been on a date here or there and had a few hookups with a really awesome trans guy.

At first I worried whether I was a chaser. But I’m attracted to the person, their look and vibe and not so much how they identify or what gender they were assigned at birth. And I still meet up mostly with cis males.

So my issue is that I’m worried about causing offense or just coming off poorly. I think that fear has kept me from reaching out first at times on apps or approaching someone at a bar. Not sure if there’s a place for tips or do’s and don’ts. I don’t treat anyone differently, but I also understand that as a cis male, I have blind spots and could be generally ignorant. For example, dirty texting with the guy I’ve hooked up with a few times got a bit awkward because of sensitive areas I didn’t expect.

Anyway, if anyone has suggestions on where I can look or maybe posts here that have discussed this, that would be super helpful. As I spend more time in welcoming queer spaces, I realize my attraction extends way beyond cis males and I’d hate to limit myself.