I don't know if this is just a vent or asking for reassurance.

I started T at the end of November, so almost 2 months now. The change I most anticipated (bottom growth) is happening pretty much as anticipated. Not had any noticeable change in voice (2nd most anticipated change) apart from when I try to sing, but wasn't expecting anything there for a while yet. I know not to expect fat redistribution for a good few months yet either.

What I wasn't expecting was the facial and body hair (not the butt hair, that I knew to expect). I'm already getting a bit of visible facial hair on my upper lip and chin, and the hair on my thighs, arms and belly are starting to get longer and darker. I know this might make some jealous, but for me it's one of the changes I was least looking forward to (second only to the possibility of hair loss). I was hoping that it would take longer to happen. I don't want to be particularly hairy, and was hoping that I would take after my mum's side of the family (like my brother has) rather than my father's (my aunt could practically grow a full beard post menopause). I'm so not looking forward to having to shave all the time.

I think a lot of it comes from concern that my anchor partner will stop finding me attractive. She (mtf non-binary) is pansexual but does have a preference for more femme people. Though she has been encouraging of my transition and very affirming from the start, and a more recent ex of hers is a more masc presenting enby who's had top surgery (but not on T). I'm already feeling self conscious with her because the bottom growth has changed what works for me for getting off, and I'm still trying to relearn it myself, and she made a comment about it being a completely different kind of hardware after not being able to get me there last time she was over.

On the other hand, I'm very much looking forward to hopefully not being misgendered quite so frequently.

So yeah, I guess that's the vent.