So 15 years ago I (33/m) was coming out of high school and had a ton of friends. I had some really close friends. One I met in college but he dropped out of college and went overseas for the military, and one
was friends with in HS and he eventually went overseas for professional sports after college for over 10 years. I lost touch with both of them during this time because I was busy with finishing college and looking for jobs and keeping up with other friends who were in the states, different time zones, moving from my own jobs, starting a family, etc.

Here we are 15 years since high school and having some really close friends to only having a few friends I grew up with that still live around the town I grew up in, that I really am not that close with anymore but we talk often because its convenient.

The one friend that moved away for the military I had met in college but he dropped out of college for the service - we were inseparable during the years he still lived in the states. After he moved away it would be years each time we would talk to each other through messaging, and it was always random. We saw each other maybe two times the past 11 years because he was in the service either overseas or on the other side of the country, but recently finished his military career in 2021. Well he passed away this month in a car accident at the age of 33 and I am so upset. They are having a funeral service for him this week and I feel like no time went by from when we were really close friends, so I am going to it. But then as I think about it, man, we have probably only talked a handful of times and saw each other a couple times since then. But I am remembering all of the great times and memories we had together before he joined the service. When he joined the service he was then just really close with his friends in the military and his friends from his hometown. We didn't talk much at all after this, and I am feeling so bad about that. I should have reached out to him more.

But I am feeling very lonely these days and this hit hard when I heard the news of him passing. I don't think I will ever have a friend as close as I was when we were friends. I don't get along with or share similar views as my current friends I talk to weekly, but I am still friends with them.

This is a vent post mostly, but I just wish I would have re-reconnected with my long lost friend. I am devastated.