I had a medical marijuana card until last month. I've noticed over the past year or so that every time I hung out with my best friend; he smokes my weed and/ or asks me to get him a pen. My card expired last month, and I didn't renew it for financial reasons.

Since then, he's only hit me up to help cut his parents grass. Every time I've helped him, he's made plans to go fishing with me within the next week. He's flaked every week. This week when he flaked, he said "we're still cutting grass grass Thursday though." This was the last straw for me, and I called him out.

I said "it feels like this whole friendship is contingent on my ability to get you weed." His response was "boohoo. You had your card, and I gave you money." Words were said on both sides. Needless to say I think the friendship is over.

I feel so hurt and broken. My only other close friends are either alcoholics/ addicts, or have moved away. I'm also not close with my family. I have no one to turn to, and I needed to get this out there; so here I am posting on reddit. I feel so alone, and stupid. Should i even be mourning a friendship that wasn't real? I did have some good times with him. I just wish i had somebody who appreciates me for me. Maybe i don't deserve it. Maybe if i was perfect normal people would actually like me.

I don't know if anyone will actually read this or what kind of response it will get. I just needed this off my chest.