What do you look for in a Bull? Choosing someone to help fulfill your fantasies is a difficult decision that carries many challenges. Many self-proclaimed “Bulls” are only out for their own pleasure, and can create very negative experiences for couples interested in pursuing the hotwife lifestyle. A few things stand out as important green flags for a potential play partner or addition to your relationship. Bulls who respect your limits, who are interested in involving both partners, and who treat you as whole people rather than as fantasy objects are far more likely to help couples have positive experiences.

First and most importantly, a good Bull will respect your limits, boundaries, and feelings. While giving the Bull “anything he wants” may be an attractive fantasy, in reality all couples have boundaries and things that don’t feel good to them. A good Bull will ask about these qproactively, and will do everything they can to avoid crossing any limits the couple has. In some cases, a good Bull will decide not to play with a couple if their limits don’t match his wants, but he should never disparage those limits or try to get the couple to abandon them. Making everyone feel safe and comfortable is the Bull’s first responsibility.

Directly related to that is the idea that a good Bull will be interested in engaging with both partners in a hotwife couple and making sure that both their needs and wants are met. Different couples will have different wants from the Bull, but a good Bull will want to make sure that both partners are getting what they want from the interaction. If the Bull shows no interest at all in the male partner and only wants to interact with or cater to the female partner (unless it’s been made clear that’s what the couple wants), this can be a sign that the “Bull” is only interested in pursuing their own wants rather than fulfilling everyone’s needs. The male partner’s wants and needs are just as important and should be addressed just as fully by any potential Bull.

Finally, a good Bull will treat the couples they play with as whole people, not just as fantasy objects. Sometimes life gets in the way. Sometimes the couple’s needs or wants change, or they need to clarify something to be sure that they are getting the support they need to feel good with the interaction. Sometimes everyone just needs to talk as people outside the fantasy to make sure that we’re all still on the same page! A good Bull will facilitate these situations and make sure that the couple’s needs are placed first. If a so-called “Bull” insists that the couple do things they are uncomfortable with, refuses to make allowances for life getting in the way, or insists on their fantasies being fulfilled above all else, the couple should seriously reconsider whether that Bull is helping them have the experiences they want.

I will admit…I am a Bull seeking new play partners, and this post is somewhat self-serving. If you like what you’ve read here and are in the North Central Florida area, you can feel free to reach out to me to see if we click. Whether you are interested in me or not, though, I hope you will consider these points as you choose partners moving forward. Too many couples, especially new couples, have bad experiences and decide to leave the lifestyle. Good Bulls are out there! Be selective in choosing partners, and don’t be afraid to demand the things you need or want. Good luck, and be safe.