# Bismillah, Discover Love and Mercy in a Female-Led-Relationship with a Devout Muslim Dominant 

Assalaamu Alaikum/Greetings of Peace, 

*I edited my previous ad, included a masked photo of myself on my profile and also attached pictures to an Imgur album to link this post to my profile (favourite cleaning product, coin minted with my birth year, wooden jigsaw puzzle piece, whistle, laser pointer, BDSM themed pins attached with keyrings, leash with a bell, lace up collar and cuffs): https://imgur.com/a/qAWO8Mm

Let us be real, there is no way to meet a compatible Muslim who is interested in a FLR Nikah/Marriage. Telling a matchmaker, relative or friend that you need their assistance in finding a Dominant/submissive spouse is impossible since I/you would fear being labelled a deviant within my/your ethnic our religious community. Personally, posting an ad seeking a potential FLR Nikah/Marriage is the best option for me. I will shoot my shot once more, inshallah khair! 

I will introduce myself: my profile name is *Lady Abyss*. Lady for wanting to signal that I need to be treated with decency, courtesy, and respect and Abyss is short for my ancestry. Inshallah, you may address me as *Han* (the short form of my nickname), thank you in advance! Please note that my nickname has nothing to do with a certain space pirate; however, I pray to respond one day with an *I know* to my inshallah future spouse's sweet declaration. 

# About Me 

I am a 40-year-old devout Muslim woman, tough yet gentle, and my ideal match would be a monogamous devoted submissive, a gentleman who embraces Islam and values the principles of a Female-Led-Relationship (FLR). 

I am a **strong-willed**, reserved, firm, compassionate, and protective woman who prays to continue to find strength in my iman/faith. Inshallah, I pray to stay on a path where I can get closer to Allah (SwT) and observe the five pillars of Islam. 

Alhamdulillah, I live in Ontario, Canada, I am single, live with my family, have a post-secondary degree, and am happily employed as a public servant. Please know that I have traditional family-oriented values and progressive social values. I am an introverted homebody, who enjoys reading (books/GNs/scripts), assembling jigsaw puzzles and watching any language closed captioned (CC) media (especially anything that features strong women). Alhamdulillah, I find peace and comfort in listening to recitations of the Quran, especially, when I am outdoors. 

I would describe my physical appearance as having: melanated skin, black/grey hair, brown eyes, height of 165cm, hourglass figure, birthmarks (skin discolouration so I have patches of light skin/many moles/dark spots (each year, I meet new moles, hahaha) - think Trills from Star Trek), and lifemarks (scars/acne/stretchmarks/smile lines/large forehead/starting to get a dark spot on my forehead - if you know, you know/sometimes I get cold sores/sometimes my forehead has visible veins – think Klingons). Also, I wear corrective lenses and rarely wear makeup. 

I **LOVE** being outdoors – everyday nature walks lasting from anytime I (hopefully one day, I can say **WE**) can spare to hours long hikes, YES, please!!! I would even be happy to be outdoors when there is precipitation (except for freezing rain – lmao, who am I kidding!? I would be fine with freezing rain if I had my spikes on my boots and I took proper safety precautions – you might as well know, being out in nature and risk management are both important to me). 

# What I Seek 

Inshallah, I pray to find a monogamous devoted Muslim submissive who has respect for the teachings of Islam and is conscious that it is possible to explore dominance and submission while also remaining committed to Islam. My preferred age range would be between 30 years old to 50 years (plus or minus a couple years). I have younger family members so I would prefer to be with someone very close to my age; however, in the interest of compatibility I would be open to a ten year age gap.

My ideal match would lead us when it comes to our deen and salaat. Inshallah, I will take over when it comes to our relationship/home. Everything else we would need to discuss; however, *please note that I would prefer a higher level FLR*. 

The character traits that I find beautiful, mashallah, someone who is: reliable, considerate, charitable, optimistic, concerned about others, conflict avoidant, open to compromise, willing to enhance what I am attracted to physically, emotionally mature, health conscious, a knowledge seeker, able to provide security/stability, and financially responsible/independent. 

Physical attributes that I find appealing, mashallah, someone who has: good posture (good fitness level/strength), a cheerful smile (oral healthcare: brushing and flossing everyday as well as visits to the dentist and dental hygienist are super important) and excellent hygiene/grooming. Your height, hairline, ethnicity, birthmarks and/or lifemarks are not on my criteria of what will inspire my attraction about in my future spouse. All I need is for you to maintain a healthy lifestyle: no smoking/vaping anything, drinking, non-prescription medication, etc.  

I do not have any children, inshallah, I would feel blessed if I had biological children, adopted children, or stepchildren. A compatible gentleman with a child or children is not a dealbreaker. Allahu a’alam, there is no guarantee that a couple can have biological children. I pray that I find someone primarily seeking a life companion, in case we are not blessed with children, we can happily be a family of two. 

As for location, I would much prefer living in my city within Ontario, Canada (located within 800 km of Toronto, Ontario). Ideally, I would like to find someone willing to relocate; however, I am conscious that whether you find someone in this dunia/lifetime and where you end up living is the Qadr of Allah (SwT). I would potentially consider relocating but it would depend on several factors. You would clearly need to explain why relocating is not a possibility for you. 

**Dealmakers:** 

* Communicate with me everyday in a respectful and timely manner. Prove through your SFW communication that "You are into me." Ask yourself, where your potential spouse should be on your priority list. I believe in a courtship, the person you are speaking with should be somewhere close to the top of your priority list. How you communicate with me now shows me, if I can rely on you.

* Enjoy performing domestic acts of service such as cooking and cleaning. 

* Be kind, proactive, responsible, reliable, and safety conscious. 

* Willing to live in a pet-free home since I have severe allergies. 

* Family-oriented and keen to spend fun quality time together especially outdoors. 

* Share your ideal *D.E.W. date timeline* (how many months from dating to engagement to wedding/Nikah – *I would like to get an idea if our timelines match*). 

**Dealbreakers:** 

* Does not care about religion. 

* Poor communication. If you do not have time to speak for the purpose of marriage, please DO NOT contact me.

* Untrustworthy, reckless, condescending, entitled, vulgar, abusive, and angers easily. 

* Judgmental of others based on their faith, identity, status, and wealth. 

* Unable to take accountability. 

* Consumed with their online activity (social media, gaming, etc.). 

# Our FLR with Islamic Values 

Inshallah, my dream is to have a monogamous Female-Led Relationship where we both respect the boundaries set by our deen. Possibly, impact play, as a form of discipline with an awareness that we mutually agreed for me to correct your behaviour in an ethical manner to motivate you to improve. We would both consent to a power exchange dynamic and ensure that we treat each other with love and mercy. 

Sometimes my eyes glaze over in tears because I need to be loved by a gentle submissive Muslim man who is action-oriented, patient, and cares deeply about my safety, comfort, and happiness. 

In contrast, on some occasions, I feel eager for an aggressive physical outlet. For example, I imagine myself in the role of either an enforcer on a hockey team or a defensive tackle on a football team. Depending on my urges, I would like to either rush, hip check, drive my spouse into a wall, or tackle him. I would like to stress that my goal is to be my spouse’s protector against anyone who tries to intimidate or harm him; however, I also want my spouse to be the focus of my physical intensity. 

By no means, am I 100% gentle! At the same time, I can assure you that I DO NOT want to cause you physical, emotional, or psychological harm. Under no circumstance would I consent to knowingly break your skin, cause you to bleed, deeply bruise you, not respect your safe word, not shower you with aftercare, or degrade you for preferring to wear gender non-conforming clothing at home. 

Inshallah, you would be my priceless gift from Allah (SwT), and I vow to do my utmost to prioritize you, make you feel seen, appreciated, secure to be vulnerable within my arms, and desired with a ferocious hunger. Without a doubt, it would be my privilege to accept your submission. 

We would also thoroughly discuss topics such as how to engage in D/s with a focus on BDSM principles: *SSC / RACK*. Safe words for both of us, aftercare, prioritize honest communication post-aftercare, and continue to educate ourselves on safe power exchange practices. I have watched several educational Youtube videos that covered the following topics: safe words, consent, BDSM glossary to understand terms, negotiations, etc. Inshallah, next, I plan to read through my digital library of instructional books on D/s, in the interest of being prepared because your safety is important to me. 

I am uncomfortable with explicit detailed intimate conversations or NSFW images outside of marriage (this is a HARD limit). **Please respect my boundaries**. It is possible to have respectful SFW conversations without graphic NSFW details. I am grateful to say that I have met wonderful gentlemen on this platform who respected my **HARD limit**. 

As vulnerable as this makes me feel, I have decided to include my *NSFW Dealmakers and Dealbreakers*, as a guide for you to verify if our NSFW inclinations are aligned. 

# NSFW after Nikah (living in our sanctuary, inshallah) 

**Dealmakers:** 

* Domestic service submission (I cannot stress this enough, this one is non-negotiable. This kink is tied to my kink of Voyeurism. I watch *you* take care of our household and I feel attraction. If you do not like Domestic service submission, we are incompatible.), Primal play (This kink is also non-negotiable because I dream of having a spouse who accepts my sometimes feral nature.), Pet play, Voyeurism (I will reiterate that I am interested in watching you perform domestic acts of service and fitness/feats of strength), Domestic discipline, Bondage, Impact play, TPE, (TBD). 

**Dealbreakers:** 

* NOTHING Illegal, NO 3rd Party - I DO NOT SHARE (No pologamy, no cuckolding, etc.), Sissification, NO Toilet play, NOTHING Public, NO recording anything NSFW, (TBD). 

*Allahu a’alam, if you think that we may be compatible but one of my dealmakers is outside of your comfort zone, you can respectfully let me know. If you decide to respond, you can use the number 9 for yes and the number 0 for no.* 

# How to Connect 

If you are out there, my dream suitor/future - fiancé/husband/best friend/submissive/prey/little spoon/pet, please take a risk as well and reach out with a respectful and well considered response, first impressions matter.  

Inshallah, if your intention is to get married for the sake of Allah (SwT), please introduce yourself, share with me your understanding of Islam, your commitment to its pillars, and your openness to exploring submission within the context of our deen. Write the word “Nikah” in the subject field of your response. Please confirm your religion/sect, age, location, and any SFW getting to know you information you feel comfortable sharing. Why did you respond to my post and how do you think we may be compatible?

If you would like to send a picture, you may share a picture of you holding your favourite cleaning product or you holding a plate with a meal/snack you prepared. Send ONLY this type of picture - this a task that I am giving *you*. DO NOT send me any other type of picture. Your picture needs to be SFW and you need to be fully covered, inshallah. In your picture, include a small piece of paper that has your profile name written on it, your nickname, the date and my profile name. 

Seriously, follow my instructions, I am looking for a FLR Nikah/Marriage with a gentleman who I can rely on to do EXACTLY what I say. If you would like to impress me, please read these articles and let me know your thoughts. DO NOT use AI to write your response. 

As a really helpful Femdom Community member eloquently said *"...take your length cue from the person you're responding to."* I wrote a long post so I expect a lengthy response. Please take your time, do not rush, write a checklist to make sure that you do not miss a step because you get one first impression.

* https://www.harpersbazaar.com/culture/features/a12063822/emotional-labor-gender-equality/\\{Women Aren't Nags—We're Just Fed Up: Emotional labor is the unpaid job men still don't understand. (By Gemma Hartley)}

* https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/weaponized-incompetence-women\_l\_61e71983e4b0d8b665717814 {‘Weaponized Incompetence’ Screws Women Over At Work And In Relationships: "Weaponized incompetence" — or "strategic incompetence" — is wearing women out, especially during the pandemic. (By Brittany Wong)}

*I have difficulty reading huge blocks of text without formatting so please use spaces in between your paragraphs.* 

As a couple super helpful Femdom Community members suggested, I created a Feeld account as well as a Discord account for vetting purposes. If your response is promising, inshallah, I will share a link to my profiles. 

Barakallahu feek, 

*Han* 

*If my post is still up, yes, I am still searching.*