I have been subscribed to this sub reddit for a few months now, and I see a lot of stories that vary from deeply saddening to outright angering, so I'm going to fill the gap with something stupid that happened to me a few years ago, to lighten the mood!

So I had been out of the Marine Corps for about a year (praise be to Gen. Mattis!!!), and was still living at home. By this time I had far out grown my parents abilities to guilt trip me into going to church. Well one weekend my mother was out of town taking care of my dying Nana, and it was up to me to take my legally blind father to church.

I forget why but I used my mother's spare car and my dads spare keys to take my dad to church. Me being lazy and appreciating the civilian life, I chose to drive my dad to church wearing nothing but a robe, boxers and flip flops. I drop him off and hurry home to go back to bed, however there is no house key on my dad's spare key chain (why he has a spare car key but can't drive I'll never know). So I drive back frantically calling him, hoping to catch him before sacrament meeting starts... no luck.

I'm sitting in the parking lot deciding what to do, and relying on my training as a Marine to improvise, adapt and overcome, I decide that since I know the church to be false and anything "holy" is bullshit anyway, I cinched up my robe and marched right in. I see my dad sitting smack dab in the middle of the congregation and flag him down and make my way down the aisle to inform him of the missing house key.

Feeling proud of myself now I make my way back to the door to the chapel and I'll be damned if one of my old scout leaders zealously jumps up shakes my hand and strikes up a short conversation about where I've been and an abbreviated tale of my exploits in the Marines.

The whole congregation is focused on me now rather than the weepy hag spilling her testimony at the pulpit, they can't ignore it any longer and I can feel their indignation drilling into me, and I am loving it, imagining and relishing every last mental comment, I can almost hear them... "what is he wearing", " this is a sacred place how dare he", " the bishop should really do something about this"...

Anyway, I left without ceremony, and got home to my bed and dreamed sweet dreams of spreading hate and discontent upon my former ward.

TL;DR I went to church in a robe and boxers to grab my dad's house key.