I think they believe as much as it benefits them to. Let me elaborate. Many of us ex-Mormons, including myself, wholeheartedly believed in the teachings of the church. By 27, I was serving on the high council, surrounded by men old enough to be my grandfather. I had fully embraced the church’s doctrine. Back then, I would have professed unwavering belief, despite never having performed miracles, seen God or angels, or received visions. So why did I believe? At that time, the church offered me numerous benefits: a sense of power, authority, and social approval. My mind did what it’s designed to do – protect me. It helped me believe whatever was necessary to maintain that reality.

These men have everything to lose and nothing to gain by leaving. They would be remembered as con men, pedophiles, and embody all that we abhor in the church. While some may be delusional enough to claim divine encounters, I think most haven’t seen God or angels. Their minds are likely guarding their reality, finding ways to justify and believe in the doctrine. This, I believe, is the true danger of the cult: the longer one is immersed in it, the more adept one becomes at warping reality to fit the narrative.