What do you all do to help sludge through the anxiety of God "bringing you back" to the faith? One of my biggest struggles since I've started my deconversion is that I fear that every bad thing that has happened to me these past few years is/was God signaling to me that I've fucked up and that I still have time go come back to him before He let's things get really bad. Weirdly I have a lot of anxiety surrounding COVID-19; that God is going to allow me to catch it, and catch a really bad case of it so that I'll end up in the hospital in order to bring me to my lowest point in order to elevate me again or something. Because apparently he does that? He "breaks" us and "brings us to our lowest point in order to bring us back to him". I used to hear all the time in church as a kid. What do you guys do to get through the nasty anxiety surrounding this?