It took me a year of living outside of the Midwest for me to realize why I feel safer in California than the Midwest as a woman.

I did not realize how often pro-life stances shame women and then never mention the man who decides to have sex with a woman without a condom who likely never even bothered to ask if the woman wants kids.

How can you bring up a topic as personal and sexual in nature as abortion and not expand the conversation to include men’s roles?

How can you shame women for choosing their freedom/career/independence and NOT shame men for not considering it? I NEVER hear women complain that the man they sleep with wears a condom. Never. It is always men complaining that they have to use one.

What a unique position the church could have in preventing abortions, if that really was their goal, in that they can shame men for not using condoms. And yet they don’t. What the fuck is that about?

Sorry, I am just very angry about this and angry that I never put into words this instance of sexism in the church and that no one else ever pointed it out to me.