I'm thinking about all the toxic and upsetting things Christians have said to me that don't align with who I used to believe Jesus to be. How much I defended the idea of a loving Jesus, and how much pushback I got from Christians.

When I share this with other Christians they say “Those aren't real Christians”, or “Those are people, not Christ.” So okay but . . .

But in the gospel when the Pharisees, Sadducees, and others condemned people Jesus stood between them protected the person being condemned, and told the crowd off. It seems most Evangelicals if they are not ranting about politics and conflating it with the bible, stay silent and maybe shake their heads but do very little to protect the image of God or Jesus. Which makes me think they simply don't care. They just want to protect themselves (fear of hell, or even being judged themselves).

So while I don't buy Chritianity anymore. I don't think mist Christians believe it either.