I miss not being afraid to showcase myself, my tastes, my face, my body and my gaze. I miss discovering music together, watching movie marathons, losing ourselves in calls, sleeping at the same time, packing up meals and going out for a drive.

I miss growing up together, I miss sharing the progress of my still struggling life, I miss being there for you when you most need it too. I miss having it easier by being with someone else who is actually there for me. I miss it being hard as fuck to have to deal with someone else's whims and quirks, since I most certainly have them to a ridiculously high extent.

I miss not being able to fail together, to be the rock for someone else's motivation, for someone to be the rock of my own anxieties and insecurities, a humble result of my intense clingy self. I guess I just wish to get to know someone in a similar situation as mine, completely fucked-up emotionally and mentally overwhelmed due to future prospects yet with enough of a soul to still very much wish to give and receive, to share music and be shared music with, to talk films and watch films through, to have discussions that lead to an enduring yet endearing all night long call.

I miss going on dates and building step after step into getting to know that special someone, be it only for a few hours, a few days, a few months, a few years, or the rest of our lives. I don't mind baggage, I love it actually; because all I really want is someone with whom I can connect with.

I miss kissing someone else's lips and feeling their humidity while thinking I'm in heaven. I miss having a regular sexual partner with whom you can allow yourself to experiment new things, raving on in your own fears, needs and desires.

I miss not having to care about impressing you because you're already too impressed already. I miss being able to just be myself, no fear of judgment, fighting it out if it gets too difficult, patching it up and make up, make out, say sorry and forgive.

I've studied film back in college and, solely on a hobby level, I podcast, take photos and edit video. I geek out on stand-up comedy and all genres of music. I'm learning to play the drums. I'm a fan of every once in a while go on raves and dance my arse off. I love driving, I love the beach and I'm a sucker for intimacy. I also speak portuguese and german. I’m agnostic, apolitical, and of an average height and weight. My motto in life tends to nowadays be: enjoy a bit of everything in moderation (including moderation itself).

I guess I just really really really miss being with someone else. And I miss meeting you.