Hi there and quick disclaimer - I am posting the below in my local sub reddit (In London, I'm English), but I travel very often to Germany (usually Berlin, sometimes Frankfurt) on business, so thought why not post here too!

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Firstly thank you very much for clicking on my post in spite of my very unimaginative posting title! It's quite weird that despite being a long, long (long!) time lurker here, and thinking about what I was going to write in this post non stop for the last week (an early apology here for writing a literal essay below!), I actually spent no time at all thinking of a funny or interesting posting title, which in some ways is probably more important than what's here. Anyway, I'm rambling before I've even begun! Let's get on with this...

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Me and my situation: So the first thing I have to say here is that I'm married. I reveal this in the knowledge that I'll immediately lose some (most?) of the small number of people who clicked on here in spite of my terrible posting title, but it's also kind of the whole point of me posting here, and I'm sure lots of other men posting here are married/attached but aren't saying, so maybe my honesty will help me to stand out!

The fact is that I'm basically pretty happy, but the last few years have had a weird impact on me in two ways: firstly I've just become acutely aware of my life passing me by (In my head I am still 30 haha), and secondly my libido, which raged in my 20s but has for so many years been forced to be dormant in a sexless marriage, has come back in a really quite alarming way. The catalyst for this (which I won't detail here, but for which a graphic account is available for anyone who wants it haha) was a very unexpected and (sadly) one off encounter I had towards the end of last year, and since then I have not been able to get the thought of doing it again out of my head. Finally this week I cracked, set up a throwaway account on here (trust me you do not want to see my real one, far too much boring football and golf discussion haha), and now here I am, writing this as a hail mary to the internet in the hope/expectation that there is a female version of me reading this somewhere in London who might be tempted to respond...

Ok I am already writing wayyyy too much so will get on with the rest of the post!

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My appearance and what I'm looking for: Whilst I might hope someone here loves my overly wordy writing style so much that they want to sleep with me, I'm more realistic that you'll probably also need physical attraction! I'm a pretty (almost annoyingly so) modest person, but I think I might as well put that to one side here, and just say that I think I'm good looking. I'm 6ft 2 (or one milimetre under but who's measuring), I have lots of dark hair, blue eyes, and a sort of tanned complexion even when it's freezing (like now!).

I'm not looking for anything at all specifically in terms of age or looks, truly truly I just really want to find someone who's either in, or has been in (and maybe has acted upon it) the same situation as me now (so I guess you have to be married/attached to understand), and who has a personality that clicks with mine. I've found in the past that when there's no emotional connection the physical connection is limited, and if I'm going to take the risk of doing this I really want it to be totally worth it (for both of us). I'm quite an extroverted character I would say, and whilst I'm not looking for someone who is like that (you could be quite introverted), I want someone who is definitely a bit unusual in their personality, either obviously or under the surface, and who lets this out through a good sense of humour and spontaneous nature.

If I'm lucky enough to get a response to this we can talk more about our fantasies and experiences to work out our match, but for me I definitely have a dominant side and would love to explore that more with a partner who's open to it - I should say for clarity that this stops well short of anything weird/gross, but it's absolutely something I'd love to take further :)

The last thing I will say is that I would really hope that this could become a regular thing, or as regular as a pretty risky relationship can be. That doesn't mean I wouldn't want to hear from anyone who wants a more casual arrangement, but thought I should put it out there :)

Ok, that's got to be much more than enough. I am stopping writing. I really hope this appeals to someone and can't wait to hear from you. xx