1)Stop watching porn

2)Practice Semen Retention, even during sex.

3)Learn to say NO to sex when you feel anxious. Forcing yourself to have sex when you are anxious will only fuel the vicious cycle.

4)Slowly reduce the amount of manual touch while edging to a point where you only need to touch the penis with two fingers near the base. This will strengthen the bulbospongiosus/ischiocavernosus muscle pair.

5)Do not schedule sex. It puts on pressure to perform and makes anxiety worse. Instead, tell your partner you DONT want to have sex and you just want to cuddle/be intimate. You will find that when the expectation to have sex isn’t there, foreplay can become very relaxing and you will forget about your anxiety.

6)Only have sex when your BODY wants to. This may seem counterintuitive but listen to your body. Stop beating yourself up. Stop letting your partner dictate when you have sex. You will find that telling your partner no makes her want you even more and the sense of control you will feel will work wonders for eliminating anxiety.

7) slow it all down. If you have established that you don’t want to have sex and you just want to be intimate, it will all happen naturally and there will be the added sexy element of doing something forbidden. Classic reverse psychology.

8)Cuddle naked with your partner with no plans of having sex. She will “misbehave” and try her best to break the no sex rule. This can be great for establishing control and beating the vicious cycle.

9) on a first date/first time situation, say NO right when things are about to go from clothed to naked. And say goodnight. Try this and thank me later.

10) Never ever force it or let your partner give you a blowjob or a hand job in hopes of getting it up. Say No the moment you feel anxious or if it is not pleasurable for you. So much misery can be avoided if you listen to your body.

11) There is a reason condoms make your penis go soft. Thousands of years of evolution are at play. Stop using condoms if you don’t want to. Get tested, find a partner you can trust, have her go on birth control etc there are many ways. Or just roll the dice and have some hot risky sex (not my advice lol) point is take control of your sexuality.