Hi everyone! I’ve been having some struggles recently between me and my INTP boyfriend. He is much more sure of himself, his ideas, his preferences, etc. than me due to dominant Ti. Because of this, there has been a common situation where he would ask for my personal opinion on something and I would just not know what to say, or rather say something really shallow that makes him feel like I don’t care about what he’s saying.

As my Ni/Fi works through it unconsciously I might come up with something hours later, but that’s long after he’s expressed frustration that he feels I don’t care about what he’s saying. He takes my “okay” or “that’s fine” as I don’t care about what he’s thinking. My brain seems to simply think slower than his. I simply don’t have much more to say in that moment.

A lot of the time I think I simply don’t have a strong opinion on things, or think that it wouldn’t be too necessary to have one at all. As ENTJs we like to gather the thoughts/opinions of others to drive our actions; that’s what Te does. I’m not used to someone asking me for my personal opinion so often, forcing me to interact with my Fi more than I ever have in the past.

I don’t know what to do about this, how to make him feel heard and cared for without me basically becoming depressed due to the stress of having to use my Fi all the time. And like a good ENTJ I’m coming to y’all to gather some thoughts on this.