Hi y'all. I've always struggled with making real friends, but recently I experienced something that I wanted to write about, so here it is. Once I posted on FaceBook that I was looking to make new friends and chat with people, and someone who goes to the same university that I graduated from messaged me. I was super excited to make a new friend for the first time in ages, but little did I know that things would go down in flames.

At first things seemed interesting. He was interesting to chat with about various topics, as he was a generally curious and knowledgeable individual. However, he also had borderline personality disorder. And that was something I had never dealt with before. Soon the friendship developed into a rollercoaster. I would say something that he would take offensively and then have to defend myself and explain how it was not actually attacking him. He kept wanting reassurance and I refused, not wanting to do that kind of emotional work with someone I knew for only a month or two. I don't want to have a friendship where I constantly have to watch myself and reassure them when they feel bad. Eventually it got so bad he cussed me out and then blocked me.

(It's been a while since someone's cussed me out, so that was quite a shock. I now understand why people with BPD have the reputation that they do.)

I wish things could've gone better because making new friends is so hard. The search continues.