Some background: I work inventory for a website that sells trading cards, and I've been mildly crushing on a coworker for awhile now. She's nice, funny, quiet, shy, cute, and from the little bit we've interacted she seems like an interesting person. We haven't interacted much outside of passing conversation because I'm also a pretty quiet and shy person, so the few times I've had the chance I've never been able to think of a way to interact with her without it seeming very forced or making it awkward for one or both of us.

The crush level has gone up recently because she got me a cheesecake platter for my birthday. Not an unusual thing as she's always bringing in cookies for everyone but it made my day all the same. I've got the chance to return the favor, but it's not under quite the best of circumstances; She's got a surgery scheduled for this week, and while it's not major she's said she's still really scared (Can't blame her). Add in her having a bout of the flu and she's been in a pretty bad place the last few weeks.

I decided to get her something to cheer her up and settled on making her cannoli (I saw from a FB post of hers that she liked it) and spent the last few days carefully finding out her favorite flavors and any food allergies she may have without directly asking her. I've got my recipes and all my ingredients, but my brain (Which is very good at self-sabotage) has come up with an outcome I'm having trouble dealing with. Putting aside the anxiety I'm feeling about just giving them to her, I'm utterly terrified she's going to think this is some kind of assholish passive-aggressive one-upmanship because I'm making the cannoli rather than buying it like she did with the cheesecake.

I could just buy the cannoli and cut all this out, but tracking down the recipes and making them has and will help with the anxiety about giving them to her. I also feel the situation calls for the extra effort. I'll most likely say this when I give them to her, but that doesn't make the thought go away or the whole thing any less daunting.

So have at me r/encouragement. Advice, encouragement, wisdom, please send word.