This is a lesson I'm learning. I realized it was unfair to myself to only allow certain things in my life to bring me joy: the perfect job, the perfect girlfriend, etc. I realized I should allow myself to enjoy other things in life, too.

I can't allow all of my self worth to be defined by whether or not I'm in a relationship. It doesn't define "me". I'm still just as whole by myself as I am with someone else.

I'm taking this month off and focusing on myself. Making sure I'm staying healthy, not worrying about dating or relationships. I won't pretend it doesn't hurt a little--it does, I still want love just as much as anyone --but I need to do what's best for me. All this worrying about it isn't productive and just gives me stress I don't need.

I'm leaving doomerism really. I don't see the point in it. Yes, the world is a harsh and cruel place but it's beautiful too. And I'll enjoy the small things life gives me.