He has the perfect character and very loyal dedicated to me. He is sweet and patient, and I feel very safe around him. I've thought about us spending an eternity together many times... but unfortunately I can't help but realize that over the past weeks, the relationship is not the same anymore 8 months ago.

He is disabled and homebound. He has a rare ear condition that currently has no cure, and he has been at home for the last 4 years. We are in a long distance relationship for most of the year, but I visit him because he lives in my hometown.

Although we are compatible personality-wise (and he truly is my other half), his disability leaves little room for physical and to some level, emotional fulfillment. I have always been the traditional romantic - and my ideal relationship is one where a man could dote on me by being very chivalrous (holding doors, driving me, picking me up, taking me shopping, going on dates, spoiling me, etc).

His disability means that at the moment, those experiences are unfathomable. I have to drive to see him. Dates pose a health and safety concern, and it has been years since he's drove a car. I feel selfish but I feel very unfeminine.

He also lives in his former parent's house so I have to account for days when his mom and grandma come over to visit. My parents do not know we are dating so when I want to see him - I have to find the perfect excuse to drive somewhere 40 minutes away, find a date where his family isn't there, and find a date where I am free. It is a stressful process, and would be much easier if he could be the one to make the trip.

I still like him a lot, and I want to spend a lot of life together. But I'm not sure how to grapple with this. Is it selfish and fantasical to want the fantasy where I am being picked up with flowers for a date? Where I don't have to worry about driving someone to meet someone? Is it better to break up and trust I can find someone to love again but without the physical barriers? Not sure what to do.

tldr; met a wonderful guy but he is disabled and homebound. i feel very unfeminine and unfulfilled for always extending myself to meet him and close the physical boundaries.