I am a very “in control” person in my life. I have to make a lot of decisions and take care of a lot of people under me. (No pun intended). This translates into the bed as well where I have the need to be in control at all times.

A little about the non-kinky me. I stand about six feet tall, black hair, and have a bulky physique that resembles a bear. I’m fortunate enough to love what I do and do what I love and am very passionate about it. I write and scribble little stories here and there.(Which I later delete because I know they are not very good!) Words open me up and sometimes teach me things about myself that I never thought I was capable of. A lot of it is very personal. I lift weights, I run, I play a sport. I like to read and try to get my hands on 2-3 books a month. I’m very articulate at times and very shy and reserved at others. It’s a pendulum that swings from one end to other. But don’t take this to understand that I am bad at communication. Nope. That I believe is a pillar of any interaction and I do it well.

A little about the kinky me: I have a fair amount of experience being a dominant both over distance and in person. My brand of dominance has been what is needed at the time. Stern, rule setting master or gentle and caring daddy. I’ve done it all. I also know that some forms of D/s play are absolutely not to be approached lightly, and I wouldn’t consider engaging in anything without discussing safewords, limits and other relevant things. Even for the dom. Aftercare is important too Here are a few things I think about BDSM,. You could consider this my manifesto of BDSM and a glimpse of the mindset/approach you will get from me.:

I believe that sexual submission can be emotionally taxing and therefore parties involved need to be consistent and reliable with their availability for long-term play. For me, the real pleasure lies in fully immersing myself in a moment with a partner. I understand that even though what might not start off as something romantic, the intimacy of any BDSM dynamic is wonderfully romantic, in a broader sense of the word. I really am not very fond of all the strict terminology we use in kink (slave, sub, maid, slut) apart from when we use them while getting up to some kinky shit in the bedroom. We are all humans and are all equals and these terms should be used with care and only to intensify our kinks. Even though we might use the terms D/s, I understand that we are not here to serve, we are here to explore our cravings and mental freedom. I believe that submission is one of the most precious things we can give and receive. It’s given, not taken, it’s maintained, and it should be based on trust and mutual respect. If both sides lay a foundation and start to understand each other’s feelings and desires and then build on this by carefully exploring what works and what does not, we can outgrow the labels we seem to live in and achieve something that is very fulfilling. Moreover, we can then reach an incredible level of confidence by experiencing the freedom that such a relationship can reach, getting deeper and deeper in our subconscious to find the true us, our genuine needs and desires. I believe that the most important, and by far the largest sexual organ, is the brain. Top 25000 reasons you should talk to me. Number 23,741 will be very average.

1. I’m cool.
2. I always write something that shows you that I’m not just in it for the hot sex (Which I am in for as well). Which is a few sentences at the least. My fingers don’t stop and I can keep your inbox full all night. I loooove dirty talk and think of myself a very cunning linguist. I go deep into detail and my words will make you wet. That being said, I expect you to do the same. Your vivid details of how we will go at it won’t scare me.
3. I understand that pictures require a level of trust. It takes time and I’m open to that. I expect you to think the same. I know a dick pic is appreciated every now and then but my little man is camera shy at times. I would still like to find out a way for us to verify ourselves to each other early on though.
4. I’m prompt about keeping up with messages. Unless I’m sleeping or working or saving kittens from animal shelters or saving damsels from lack of orgasms, I usually will reply as soon as I can. Within an hour at most. Again, this is also appreciated from you.
5. I’m comfortable with whatever shape your body is currently in. I’d love it if you were comfortable but if you weren’t, I hope our interactions might help you build up that confidence. I’ve always felt somewhat surprised by the standards of beauty in society because even my physical desires of lust have had all kinds of women on both sides of the standards. I believe that regardless of anybody’s personal preferences, a person’s appearance is such a small part of who they are, and an even smaller part of the pleasure they have the capability of achieving. I would looooove to make you feel sexy. To have you KNOW for a fact that you are desired and that you turn me on and make me feel aroused. You will know the effect you have on me by me telling you in vivid detail how you get me going. I’m interested in the person inside the body more than the body itself.
6. Even though it may seem this way by the subject of this post, I’m more than a penis attached to a body with a thundering sex drive. I enjoy the dirty talk but I am also up for regular conversation. You will find a good listener who will tread the line between emphasizing and helping you find solutions. Let’s find something in common and talk while I fantasize how your legs are going to be tied to the bedpost and you’ll be fucked senseless and I’ll cum inside you. I’d be very happy to be your friend beyond any sexual shenanigans we get up to. In fact, that is what I would ideally like to build this dynamic upon. A friend, a guide. I also understand that some people like to keep their kinky life seperate from the non kinky one. I understand this as well. Though I’d be very happily have us get to know each other. As someone that dabbles into creative things from time to time, I love it when people talk about what they love, be it something creative or some workplace politics or tales of your childhood pet. This could be a far fetch but I’d also be up to try some sort of writing/creative collaboration. Having said all that, I’d just as happily have a silly time with you. What I’m trying to say is, I’d love to get to know you if you’d let me.
7. I give a fuck. In fact, I give all the available fucks. Just think, if I’m making so much effort just to attract you into reading this, how much more effort do you think I’ll bring to an actual conversation. If we click, you can bet I’ll be really engaged in what we do and you’ll be glad of the day you hit the send button on the message. Though I would say all things are negotiable and on the table except a few things that are hard limits. When a dominant, I always enjoyed giving them out but always did it in a way that didn’t seem like manual labour.

I’d like to text with you. And then take it to audio calls and more. I’d like you to be straightforward and honest and open about your desires ad communicate them well. Conversation and good humour is always desired.

For the price of your submission and attention, you will find a fun partner and friend to explore and enjoy the finer and kinky things in life. A friendly, caring, and affectionate companion who you can share things with. An involved co-op gaming partner and much much more.

If you’ve enjoyed what I read do send me a message. And be as articulate as you can and want to. The more open we are, the better we can help each other fulfill our desires.

Maybe it’ll just stay a conversation. Just friendly banter. But if we feel this kinky spark, well, I dont need to say much more what might happen.