Firstly, I understand that looks and attraction to one's partner are important. Happy to share a pic once we connect and see if we're actually looking for slthe same thing. For now, I'm cute? I think. Can a 31 year old guy be cute? I'm not sure anymore. But hey I'm not terrible looking and I'm in relatively decent shape 😂

It feels kind of weird looking for a connection on Reddit but I guess I could explain why I am a little bit just in case you're thinking "Anyone looking for a connection on reddit must be garbo". I don't really have an issue approaching women irl. I'd say I'm a pretty confident person and just genuinely enjoy meeting new people. But, as you get older you spend less and less time out in those classic dating areas. Combine that with being out of school, not really wanting to date in the workplace, dating apps being an absolute dumpster fire, and my particular-ness in the type of relationship I'm looking for, I figured this medium gives me a good chance to explain all of it and connect!

I mean, I've actually had the good fortune of meeting a few long term partners in real life. Sometimes a mutual friend, sometimes a total shot into the dark "ask you out while in line for coffee" sort of thing. Some people say romance is dead but not to this guy! I'm here taking my shot and putting it all out there (minus a picture but I'm happy to share once we talk!)

I think it's just a little more difficult to make that sort of connection, or find it, as I get busier as an adult. Plus, as I've dated and experimented I've come to understand a lot more of what I really want in a relationship. I could take a chance and randomly date again but this seems like a really good opportunity to write at length about myself, what I'm looking for, and what I'm not looking for.

For starting a short physical description -

White

200lbs

5"10'

Tattoos (nothing major just a sleeve and some extras)

Short brown hair

Pretty average build but I'm working on my ideal body type.

You can probably tell I'm a...super average white guy lol. I've never been bad in the looks department. I tend to get "cute" but not hot or built or sexy or anything. I just like to be in an area where I'm confident about my body and am able to enjoy it (as well as my future partner.)

Health is important to me in that aspect. No body is perfect but diet and exercise only get more difficult the older you get and I'd like to find someone that compliments that area of my life (maybe not work out together but it's always way harder to not go to the gym when you see your partner driving out in the snow to get it done).

I enjoy a mixture of being active, even in the winter. That means a lot of hockey, gym time, walks and hikes. Really whatever I'm feeling for being active that day. It's not everything and I don't go overboard with it, believe me. I enjoy sitting around and binging tv or playing games with my friends as much as the next person.

I tend to use way too much humor. Definitely to a fault sometimes. My therapist would definitely say it's a defense mechanism but....well nobody is perfect! And there's definitely a lot worse mechanisms out there lol.

My personality is lighthearted, caring, thoughtful. Lots of jokes. My love language is definitely quality time and acts of service. It's very important to me that I do things for my partner. The little things. Random things. To let them know I'm thinking about them and that they're loved!

What will our life look like? Hopefully camping, backpacking, vacations, going out on dates with friends, easy nights in during cold winters, cooking together. I'm not really decided on children but if I found someone I really loved? Sure! It's definitely in the mix.

Personally I enjoy my work. I just got into a new field (been working at getting into it FOREVER) so I'm super jazzed about that. I don't have any pets but I'm hoping to have a dog someday.

Like I said, my free time after work is mostly a mixture of being active, cooking, playing games with friends, watching some choice moves or TV shows. On the weekends I enjoy going out to a cafe and getting some reading done. But ultimately with me I'd say you're signing up for fun nights and a committed partner.

Other people's happiness is important to me. I'm definitely the "start your car and wipe it off of snow" in the morning type of guy. Just doing the little things to let you know I care means a lot to me.

So, what am I looking for? Definitely a relationship. I mean, things build and take time so no pressure there but it's the end goal. Someone to have a great night in with. Cold nights, and good movie, a heavy blanket, a fireplace, some popcorn. The works! But also someone to experience life with. Someone to work for and care for. Someone to understand a little more everyday and make laugh. Someone to bring joy to their life.

I'm definitely attracted to strong personalities and I can expand on the FLR thing a bit. I'm not strictly looking for some one way super kinky power dynamic. Not at all. I'm all about balance and real, caring relationship dynamics. So doesn't sweat it if you're thinking "There's no way I can take the lead in a relationship". I'm not asking you to. I'm just looking for a decent balance.

Geographical location is big. This is a serious thing looking to turn into a serious relationship. If you aren't at least in the United States I'd say it doesn't have much of chance of actually making it past the long distance stage. And that's what this is all about. Throwing out what I'm looking for and being serious about making it a reality. I guess if I just wanted any relationship, I could just search locally. But this is me taking the chance of being pretty specific with what I'm looking for. With the nationwide search that follows that, it's important we both know and be realistic about long distance. I JUST started in a new field so I can't really up and move right away.

So, normally I'd not lead with anything nsfw but again, I think the strength of posting here vs an app is being able to really put out there what you're looking for as where a dating app is pretty much just a picture. So as for the nsfw, I tend to be a bit of a switch. Naturally I get pigeon holed into being the dominant most of the time and that comes natural but I generally enjoy the submissive side of fantasy. I have a huge thing for cuckolding but that's not something I'm even sure I'd ever want to take out of the fantasy realm. Could be playing with fire. Definitely ideal to have it as a shared fantasy however. Maybe it seems shallow bringing it up here but something like that definitely needs a lifestyle match. Other than that, my submissive side skews towards being a bit of a service sub. So, giving lots of free use oral and stuff like that. Happy to elaborate more but for now, you should know what you're getting into!

Ok, my thumbs are about to fall off after typing all of this. Remember when you had to hit each number pad multiple times back in the day to choose each letter for a text message? Shit was wild.

I'm happy to exchange photos once we get talking and there's a vibe. After all, there's no avoiding the fact that attraction is an important part of a healthy relationship.

So, if this is something you're interested in and you think you might want to strike up a convo to dive a little deeper, send me a short intro message about yourself! :)