I’m a 30 yo lesbian femme. To my family, friends, and girlfriend, I’m the gold star lesbian. I've never been interested in men and have never even experimented… until recently. I was actually told that I'm attractive to men because I’m not butch like my gf. Kinda weird to me. For more context, I have wavy chestnut hair, hazel eyes, plump lips, and a round face. Generous curves, petite frame, kind of a short stack.

It started with a guy I met at the bar. We talked, exchanged numbers, and he was very flirty. I found myself strangely interested and then got cold feet and blocked him. Some time later, we reconnected and, because of my newfound obsession with cock and men, I was in a vulnerable spot. All the questioning made things awkward with my gf—she doesn’t know, but I felt suffocated and could have used a cuddle at the time. He invited himself over and we watched movies, hugged, and spooned, and then he took things from 0 to 100 in an instant and slipped the tip inside me. In hindsight, I probably encouraged him. I could have easily stopped it or said something, but I didn’t. I made him leave on the spot before things went any further and blocked him again even though it felt amazing. I couldn't admit to myself how good it felt.

In the meantime, I’ve explored this new curiosity online with redditors. Nothing serious, just writings to try to satisfy my curiosity without having to come out as possibly bi (maybe?) in real life. This helped but also didn’t—it made me more curious to try things with a man, enough to do something crazy. I had a meeting with this ex-student of mine for coffee to check how he was doing. He was cute, so I thought I’d try all the tips I was given about how to get it on with a man. He came home with me and we talked and cuddled—no sex happened, but he did get horny and showed me how hard he was. I don't know where I found the courage to ask him to cum all over me. I didn’t even touch him; he did it all himself and emptied himself over my (naked) body. The way he looked at me with lust and desire and seeing him towering over me... I can't forget it.

Because I’m a chicken, I blocked him too. Lol. The experience was so hot though, I think about it when I’m having sex, and I know that if I met him again, I would let him do all kinds of things to me. Maybe I will go back to him. In the meantime, here I am, looking for guys willing to help me explore my confusion and cravings online. I feel too much pressure to come out with this in real life for the time being.

I want to get familiar with talking to guys, learning what makes you tick, and hearing all the filthy things you’d do to me that I'd never have thought about before. I want to be taught how to please you. I want to get used to looking at men, their bodies, their cocks, and understand what types of men I find attractive. Or… just talking, anything! Bonus points if you feel comfortable leading because I clearly have no idea what I’m doing, lol.

Let me know a bit about yourself if you hit me up (the chats get buggy so be patient).