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Yeah. My snake doesn't work.
That's a lie. It works alright! I just couldn't pass up the pun! Anyways. I'm looking for a sexy punny girl to chat with tonight. I'm obviously hilarious and horny. Well if you could see my pants it would be obvious. Either that or I'm packing a banana in my pocket. What did the banana say to the vibrator? "Why are you shaking?!? it's not like she's going to EAT you!". I don't have a vibrator in my other pocket. It's just a joke.
Some of my kinks include dirty jokes, pussy eating, cleavage, sexy outfits, cuddling and more! Not particularly hardcore but I do like the idea of light bondage.
Mostly looking to chat tonight. Pics in my post history if you go back far enough.
My other idea I've been floating with my friends is an orgasm delivery service. $20 Orgasms Guaranteed!
Just like the ad says. $20 for an orgasm or three for $50. Any of you lovely ladies need a good dicking or fingering or tongue experience? Call now! I'm discrete and professional but your neighbours still might be jealous... I'll do my best!
I'm a pleasure specialist. A real G-spot whisperer. You owe it to yourself to have a good time. 2020 was a bad year and 2021 was worse. Start 2022 with a $20 bang! Economical and environmentally friendly too. I'm tall dark and handsome and eager to please. Have a long hard day at the office? Give me a call! Had a day at the office that wasn't long or hard enough? Give me a call!
I do birthdays, weddings, divorces, funerals, etc. I give any occasion a happy ending.
Industry leading guarantee! Satisfaction or your money back!
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- 2 years ago
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