"Oh! Look, there's one! Ohmygoooooddsss, a real human!"

I can hear the distinctive echo in the girl's voice before she pops around the corner, eagerly waving her omni-cube and snapping a picture before I can so much as put my grocery basket down. Here I was, hoping I'd be able to get through at least the produce isle before another encounter...

"Man, oh man, oh man," she breathes, bouncing up and waving with the distinctive vigor of an eager tourist from a high-gravity planet. "You're real! You're actually real! It's so cool to actually, y'know, meet one of you! I'm Shali, and I've wanted to visit Earth for soooo long now!"

Forcing my best neighborly smile onto my face, I nod, my hopes of making a peaceful exit in order to beat the traffic dying an ignoble death.

"Yup. Real. Carbon-based, ten fingers, ten toes, even mammalian. Glad you find it so-"

"Oooh, I thought this was a place for eating? They have these here, though!"

Looking down at the piles of produce, I can't stop a heavy sigh. "Those are cucumbers; they're actually food. Shocking, I know, and - okay, that one's a ginger root, I don't think anyone puts those up their-"

Shali's already eagerly peering around the store, her eyes narrowing in consternation.

"Why does everyone look so glum? You're on Earth! You ought to be frolicking in the isles, instead of looking at those little black squares and wearing... these."

Gently plucking Shali's fingers off my trousers, I rub my temples. Everyone remembers First Contact; no one wants to remember what happened when they spotted the black leather couch in the Ambassador's office and started asking questions. I mean, the Visitors have been nice enough, but... some days, it just gets a bit much. Would a quick look at Wikipedia have been too much to ask?

"It's the world of won~ders," Shali trills, and I sigh again, a smile beginning to tug at my lips in spite of myself.

There are certainly worse things that they could've picked up on...

Just a silly idea, written more just to get the idea out than anything - an alien race of cheery tourists has the solitary flaw of only bothering to check out our porn before buying a ticket to visit. Granted, their wide-eyed wonder can provide some... opportunities.

As always, I'm happy to hear from you, no matter the time or no matter what ideas you'd like to lob my way! Thanks for reading, and have an awesome day/night/whenever it is for you.