Internet trolling isn't cool kids. Oh boy, is it uncool.

I don't know what it was. I guess I was just a little insecure about the whole thing. I mean, a cock is a really small detail of a person's whole body, right? Well, yours isn't small, but that's another story. I found the pictures on your profile cute, but you've got a penis. And like, penis=gay. It's a well established formula.

So when I saw you just doing your thing, living your own life, I just couldn't stand it. I had to show you.

"Lol traps are gay", I wrote.

God, that showed you, didn't it? I really fucking got you. That's what I thought. Then you replied.

"I'll show you gay you little pussy."

I thought it was just an idle threat. But it wasn't. Just like when you told me that if I didn't hurry up with your beer you'd shove the bottle up my ass. But that's another other story.

There was a knock at the door. "What the fuck?" I thought. I wasn't expecting anyone.

"Pizza!"

"Ah, that's alright then." I thought, getting up to answer the door without a second thought. And there you were. You were dressed, this time, but I recognised you from the post. Then you had your hand around my throat. God, were you strong. I guess never judge a book by it's cover. You looked so cute and dainty, I never thought you could choke me out. I guess I'm really skinny for how little I work out. The last words I heard were.

"Extra sausage and garlic sauce.."

Oh dear. I've heard that one before. Turns out you're a pretty damn good hacker. Finding out where I lived wasn't that hard. You just snuck in the backdoor of my profile and then jacked the mainframe connection to get my address vector. Crazy, huh?

When I woke up, the first thing I saw was the blinking light of my webcam.

"Liking traps is gay, huh? Well.. get ready to turn gay."

"Wait wait wait, you can't just turn someone gay, it's 2018, man."

"Nuh-uh. You're wrong. Can't turn all chill now. Liking traps is gay and you're about to fuck one."

"Isn't what you're doing worse than being homophobic?"

"For the purpose of the story, this is actually justified. I'm the good girl, you're the bad guy and you're about to get disciplined."

"Oh. Shit."

"Now, open wide buttboy. Welcome to the community. The pornhub community!"

Remember, guys. Absolutely never indulge in internet trolling. I did it once, and my girlfriend is literally nutting inside me right now. She says hello.