Chad Thundercock (of the Southwestern North Dakota Thundercock Sioux) was an abysmal penpal. He not only rarely managed to put together a whole paragraph at a time, but when he did it inevitably consisted of multiple run-on sentences without a jot of punctuation.

The vast majority of his posting history consisted of crude comments and one-hundred and forty seven consecutive repostings of the same prompt -- the infamous "[M4FFF] Hey Bby Jump On This!!!!" post that for some reason seemed to hit the top of the "Hot" page every time it was trotted out.

By now, practically every female on the subreddit had tried out and been ghosted by Chad's unique version of correspondence, which truthfully mostly consisted of text speak abbreviations and unsolicited pictures of his eponymous appendage. But, Oh My God! what an appendage it was!

Now, as anyone knows, women are all secretly in search of that fictional penis of such massive girth and length that our panties spontaneously combust, and almost every male tries to claim inches far above the world average. But Chad's cock was the Real Deal, and he had no hesitation in sending out photos to prove it.

There were photos of his cock pounding spikes into railroad ties. A picture showing it dwarfing a whole six-pack of soda cans, and then crushing them flat and tossing them over Chad's shoulder. One showed his massive tallywhacker bench pressing 230 pounds. Another showed a bucket of his cum filled to the three-quart line.

A lot of girls scoffed and claimed it was PhotoShop manipulation, until Chad would link to the video of his penis pounding a concrete slab into rubble, simply by him aiming it down and twerking. There were reports of stallions committing suicide after witnessing Chad empty his bladder. If Chad could have written a coherent sentence, he could have dashed off the entire Gettysburg Address in the snow.

It was one fucking impressive cock.

Too bad it couldn't write worth shit.

Never let it be said I can't meet a challenge...