First of all, let me say that elves are not lewd. They're not; it's just a simple and shameful falsehood, no doubt spread by the orc lobby to besmirch the reputation of a wonderful species with a rich and fascinating culture. There's not a hint of anything even slightly lewd about them, I promise you.

Granted, many elves might happen to be very fond of showing affection physically - and that's wholesome. Thoroughly wholesome; who among us hasn't greeted a friend with a warm hug, a friendly handshake, a long and wide-eyed sloppy throating, or a pat on the back? Just because a few fine people who happen to be elvish I've met might prefer one of those over the other doesn't, y'know, mean anything. Although Lyssa, if you're reading this, my legs still twitch a little when I think of you never needing to come up for air, thank you very much. And Clariel, that time when I walked in on you naked with your butt in the air, mumbling something about humans - that was just as lovely too; please don't think I'm knocking you for it.

And, sure, many times elves may want to get physically intimate, in special ways, with people they care about! It's not like it's a tradition or anything. Everyone shows intimacy from time to time! If someone, say, like a certain cerulean-haired lass I may have met, wants to show it by getting railed over every available piece of furniture and has a different toy stuffed up her butt every time I turn around, that's just her thing, y'know? Maybe some people, on an entirely individual level, may enjoy holding hands and getting patted on the head after a long and succulent session of lazy Sunday-morning cock worship (Samriel), or going for long walks and longer fucks on the beach (Cynwen...) or have a thing for celebrating human holidays in alarmingly cute ways. Like, completely hypothetically, wearing cute little bunny ears over her pointed ones, and padding around with nary a stitch inside using those suspiciously butt-plug-like eggs to good effect.

But that's purely individual and says nothing about elves. So, let's set the record straight, here:

Elves are not at all lewd, in any way, and anyone who says otherwise is slanderous. I'm very sorry if I may have given anyone the impression that those are my thoughts.

I'd also like to take this opportunity to say that I am in no way looking for cute elven girls to go on a fantasy romp with. No way. None. That's not a thing I'd ever do.

Thank you for listening.