It has been a long and perilous journey to get to this point, winding through the foothills of the Whately District and creeping beneath the fields in an old and disreputable corner of the New England countryside long forgotten by modernity. It was a tip from an old man of my acquaintance, an aged sailor of a curious breed, that had led me here at long last, after much poring over texts and referencing the work of gentlemen from the Society. Not more than an hour ago, since I first clambered beneath the rotted boards of a cracked stone well amidst a barren field, my compass had commenced to a weird spinning before the needle simply broke, split wholly in two.

I must confess, the fear grips me now, the sense in my belly of trespassing on the demesne of something ancient beyond belief, a presence from before the first men set foot on these shores. Up ahead, now, I can see a queer light flickering, just beneath a door.

A door, sent into the rock - I tremble to think of what lies beyond it! - and my fingers are curling much without conscious thought around the grip of my Webley, my father's from the last war. Should I turn back now, my expedition will be in vain, and I would only return to the Society with -

"Eyyyyy!"

The most awful chill races down my spine, seizing that within me which knows a fear before thought, and with questing hands, I reach to push the door open, the voice from beyond echoing in my ears with a strange and terrible precision. The dark is here, the dark! And with it, the light bursts forth, a light that -

"Eyyyy. Lol."

With two crisp snaps of her fingers, the being beyond levels what I can only call a finger-gun at me, piercing eyes shining amidst a face of almost alien beauty. Pallid skin and raven hair, black cloth encircling her throat, and -

Uh.

Oh.

She's not wearing much clothing at all, is she? Something like... oh, Christ. That's a sweatshirt with the chest open, and she seems to be quite... ample.

Laughing, the girl shoots me a wicked grin, the flare that had risen unbidden to my hand, to light the weird scene, dying in a sparking shower of red. blue "'Sup. I was wondering when one of you would finally show up. Like it?"

Beaming, she shakes her chest at me, and my eyes are bound to follow the fulsome sway. My shock must be plainly apparent, as she laughs again, reaching into the bowl on the dais before her and bringing forth a cluster of bright red-and-blue items wrapped in a clear film. Popping one into her mouth and swallowing noisily, my acquaintance from beyond smacks her lips, a wink gracing my gaze.

"Tide Pods. Love 'em. Check it out, though - what you've always wanted, right?"

Another sway, another bright-eyed grin above all that bouncing, mouthwatering flesh, and ever word dripping like honey from her lips is imparted with an earnest precision.

"A big tiddy goth G-F."

My eyes flicker from the carvings on the wall, an assemblage of large-eyed, tongue-lolling women drawn in a very... ah, impressionistic style.

"Ayy, lmao. You don't need the ahegao wall, man. I got Netflix and chill here."

Stepping closer, she plants a kiss on my cheek, and I can feel my body rise to respond as that unnatural warmth - okay, that actually feels very natural, with the, um, muchness on display, although there's a disconcerting whiff of laundry sauce to her breath.

Slowly, I can feel her tongue curl out and flick up my cheek, those bright octarine pools swirling into my own brown-eyed gaze.

"Come," she breathes, and I can feel my resistance slipping, an awful dread and lust welling up within me, confronted by this creature from outside space and understanding itself. Perhaps I have already gone insane - perhaps! - but now there is only left... enjoyment, as her words undo me at once.

"I will show you de way."

Yeah, I wrote this. Something about slapping H.P. Lovecraft and some of the weirdest memes of the past year together just hit me. I'm pretty sure my muse is drunk, high, or both, but I certainly had fun following her on this one!

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