New filters on the Home Feed, take a look!
view details

This post has been de-listed

It is no longer included in search results and normal feeds (front page, hot posts, subreddit posts, etc). It remains visible only via the author's post history.

2
[M4A] A room, a man, and salt. And... maybe.
Author Summary
werewizard is a male looking for anyone
Post Body

I want you to picture a room. It doesn't really matter what; just imagine it as the sort of room that's more a retreat, a refuge, than a sleeping place. There's a bed, of course, maybe some posters on the wall; childhood toys arranged neatly in little ranks on the desk and a shelf of books, colorful in their order, flanking the bed.

Got that? It's all right. Take a few minutes, if you have to, to get that image in your head; I can wait.

Now in that room, there's a young man, crying. A scatter of olive-green clothing spilling out of a backpack on the bed; little stars-and-stripes checked on the thick quilt his grandmother made for him nestled around his shoulders. Just one close-cropped head of hair, brown eyes rimmed with red, and tears. Salt drips down his cheeks, shoulders shaking in the slight chill, his knees drawn up to his chest.

You're probably wondering why he's crying, right? Or stopped reading there. It doesn't matter. You've probably stopped reading ages ago, given that there's no sign of bimbos or improbably single CEOs lusting after secretaries in pencil skirts; no lurid fantasies of rutting in a supply closet or feeling the first tender kss of youth.

I'm sorry. It's not that sort of story.

He's crying for an angel, if you wanted to know. Every muscle in his body hurts, sometimes. Shakes, even, with a helpless sadness that underneath the mistletoe, there's just him. Maybe he should reach out and let the same fire fill him as when he calmly issues orders- there's no barking, not for the good ones- or steps onto a plane or does any one of a million other things. Maybe he should, right?

That angel might be one he saw in a dream, months passing in the night as he slept, a gentle blue glow suffusing his dream and tears dripping down his face as he saw her, in the soft still white of a fresh snowfall. It's been a "year," to the day, since that dream ended. He should've known; he had months to figure it out, realize it wasn't real, but he knelt in the snow and pulled out a ring and looked at the woman who had made him the happiest-

And the dream ended.

Maybe the angel sending tears coursing down his cheeks is someone he's yet to meet. Maybe that rustle outside his window isn't a tree scraping on the glass, but an angel's wings. Maybe all the stories that flow out of him are just a sad, stupid attempt to capture his dreams again, to feel that warmth in his heart that seems impossible to capture in his grasp for real. All those stories- books and angels and Death himself in a silent parade across the echoes of his mind. Maybe they should go, sink down to the deep, black dark with him, and sleep forever in the hope that the dream will return.

But maybe not.

Are you picturing that room, the man, the soft rustle, there? If you are, maybe you can imagine an angel, too. Maybe that angel has an easy smile and short hair and clipped wings, slapping him upside the head and telling him it'll be all right. Maybe she's all softness and light and warmth and kindness, telling him he can rest in her arms for a while.

Hell, maybe the angel's a brother, a sister he never had, taking him by the belt and dragging him the last meters through a storm of mud and lead inside his brain.

Maybe it's you.

Author
Account Strength
100%
Account Age
8 years
Verified Email
Yes
Verified Flair
No
Total Karma
17,301
Link Karma
3,634
Comment Karma
13,596
Profile updated: 4 days ago
Posts updated: 2 months ago
rough & snug

Subreddit

Post Details

They Are
a male
Looking For
anyone
We try to extract some basic information from the post title. This is not always successful or accurate, please use your best judgement and compare these values to the post title and body for confirmation.
Posted
7 years ago